Can You Answer The Unanswerable Questions ?

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PostWed Nov 02, 2011 3:00 am » by Troll2rocks


constabul wrote:I think all these questions and more can be answered with bible quotes.



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PostWed Nov 02, 2011 3:02 am » by Acooldude


Weak. But I'm glad you had fun with it!

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PostWed Nov 02, 2011 3:04 am » by Kinninigan


constabul wrote:I think all these questions and more can be answered with bible quotes.


:dancing:

Did Noah have woodpeckers on the ark? If he did, where did he keep them?

Where do people in Hell tell other people to go?

What is Satan's last name?

When Atheists go to court, do they have to swear on the bible?

In libraries, do they put the bible in the fiction or non-fiction section?

:banana:

If a transvesite goes missing, would you put their face on a carton of Half and Half?


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PostWed Nov 02, 2011 3:10 am » by Constabul


troll2rocks wrote:Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

"I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man. She must be quiet." (1 Timothy 2:12)

Can fat people go skinny dipping?

"Go, now, attack Amalek, and deal with him and all that he has under the ban. Do not spare him, but kill men and women, children and infants, oxen and sheep, camels and asses." (1 Samuel 15:3)

Can you be a closet claustrophobic?

"And the males likewise gave up natural relations with females and burned with lust for one another. Males did shameful things with males and thus received in their own persons the due penalty for their perversity." (Romans 1:27)

Why is the word "abbreviation" so long?

Happy those who seize your children and smash them against a rock." (Psalm 137:9)

Is it possible to be totally partial?

"When the men would not listen to his host, the husband seized his concubine and thrust her outside to them. They had relations with her and abused her all night until the following dawn, when they let her go. Then at daybreak the woman came and collapsed at the entrance of the house in which her husband was a guest, where she lay until the morning. When her husband rose that day and opened the door of the house to start out again on his journey, there lay the woman, his concubine, at the entrance of the house with her hands on the threshold. He said to her, 'Come, let us go'; but there was no answer. So the man placed her on an ass and started out again for home." (Judges 19:25-28)

What's another word for thesaurus?

"You shall not let a sorceress live." (Exodus 22:18)

If a book about failures doesn't sell is it a success?

Jephthah made a vow to the Lord. 'If you deliver the Ammonites into my power,' he said, 'whoever comes out of the doors of my house to meet me when I return in triumph from the Ammonites shall belong to the Lord. I shall offer him up as a holocaust.' ... When Jephthah returned to his house in Mizpah, it was his daughter who came forth, playing the tambourines and dancing. She was an only child: he had neither son nor daughter besides her. When he saw her, he rent his garments and said, 'Alas, daughter, you have struck me down and brought calamity upon me. For I have made a vow to the Lord and I cannot retract'." (Judges 11:30-1, 34-5)

If a funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their lights off?

"Then God said: 'Take your son Isaac, your only one, whom you love, and go to the land of Moriah. There you shall offer him up as a holocaust on a height that I will point out to you'."(Genesis 22:2)

When companies ship Styrofoam, what do they pack it in?

Wives should be subordinate to their husbands as to the Lord." (Ephesians 5:22)

If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

"Slaves, be subject to your masters with all reverence, not only to those who are good and equitable but also to those who are perverse." (1 Peter 2:18)

If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest is there a sound?

If two men are fighting and the wife of one of them comes to rescue her husband from his assailant, and she reaches out and seizes him by his private parts, you shall cut off her hand. Show her no pity. (Deuteronomy 25:11-13)



ok this lost interest with 2 dozon questions,....
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PostWed Nov 02, 2011 3:17 am » by Niji666


I have one for you. How do they stick the non stick shit to non stick pans????
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PostWed Nov 02, 2011 3:18 am » by Noentry


Can You Answer The Unanswerable Questions ?

NO
"The third-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking with the majority.
The second-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking with the minority.
The first-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking."
A. A. Milne

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PostWed Nov 02, 2011 3:20 am » by E6722maj


ha ha great questions to which i have no answers :cheers:

.
whatever

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PostWed Nov 02, 2011 3:22 am » by Niji666


Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

It does, as soon as it's dry. That's why you can't get dry glue out of the bottle.

Can fat people go skinny dipping?

I hope not.

Can you be a closet claustrophobic?



No, I can't.

Why is the word "abbreviation" so long?

To demonstrate need.

Is it possible to be totally partial?

No, but it's possible to be partially total.

What's another word for thesaurus?

Synonym-finder.

If a book about failures doesn't sell is it a success?

No; then it's an example.

If a funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their lights off?

No.

When companies ship Styrofoam, what do they pack it in?

Cardboard.

If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

No, then you have double the problem.

If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest is there a sound?

Sure -- if someone is there to hear it.

If a parsley farmer is sued, do they garnish his wages?

Only if he loses.

When it rains, why don't sheep shrink?

Lanolin.

Should vegetarians eat animal crackers?

No, and neither should anyone else -- have you seen the ingredient list?!

Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?

No, since funeral processions never arrive at night.

What do you do when a endangered animal eats endangered plants?

Smile.

Do hungry crows have ravenous appetites?

Yes.

If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands?

Only if she sees it.

If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

Only if another personality calls for help.

Is there another word for synonym?

Yes -- check your thesaurus.

Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Yes, but it is accurate.

When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?

Yes (they get printed before the strike).

When you open a bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be thrown away?

No.

Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"?

The beach, like the rest of us.

Why isn't there mouse flavored cat food?

Because people buy cat food, not cats.

Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

No. Mean flies call them "cripples".

Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?

No, they're afraid George Michael will try to sneak in.

If a turtle does not have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

Neither; he's dead.

Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?

They don't. They just use new ones, which only come sterile.

Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Because that's what their goggles were attached to, and they needed the goggles to fly.

Is it true cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?

No; there's nothing funny about clowns.

If you shoot a mime, should you use a silencer?

Preferably.

What is the speed of dark?

Zero.

How come we never hear about gruntled employees?

Because there aren't any.

Any more questions?

and here's your answers
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PostWed Nov 02, 2011 3:25 am » by Troll2rocks


niji666 wrote:Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

It does, as soon as it's dry. That's why you can't get dry glue out of the bottle.

Can fat people go skinny dipping?

I hope not.

Can you be a closet claustrophobic?



No, I can't.

Why is the word "abbreviation" so long?

To demonstrate need.

Is it possible to be totally partial?

No, but it's possible to be partially total.

What's another word for thesaurus?

Synonym-finder.

If a book about failures doesn't sell is it a success?

No; then it's an example.

If a funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their lights off?

No.

When companies ship Styrofoam, what do they pack it in?

Cardboard.

If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

No, then you have double the problem.

If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest is there a sound?

Sure -- if someone is there to hear it.

If a parsley farmer is sued, do they garnish his wages?

Only if he loses.

When it rains, why don't sheep shrink?

Lanolin.

Should vegetarians eat animal crackers?

No, and neither should anyone else -- have you seen the ingredient list?!

Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?

No, since funeral processions never arrive at night.

What do you do when a endangered animal eats endangered plants?

Smile.

Do hungry crows have ravenous appetites?

Yes.

If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands?

Only if she sees it.

If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

Only if another personality calls for help.

Is there another word for synonym?

Yes -- check your thesaurus.

Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Yes, but it is accurate.

When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?

Yes (they get printed before the strike).

When you open a bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be thrown away?

No.

Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"?

The beach, like the rest of us.

Why isn't there mouse flavored cat food?

Because people buy cat food, not cats.

Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

No. Mean flies call them "cripples".

Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?

No, they're afraid George Michael will try to sneak in.

If a turtle does not have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

Neither; he's dead.

Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?

They don't. They just use new ones, which only come sterile.

Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Because that's what their goggles were attached to, and they needed the goggles to fly.

Is it true cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?

No; there's nothing funny about clowns.

If you shoot a mime, should you use a silencer?

Preferably.

What is the speed of dark?

Zero.

How come we never hear about gruntled employees?

Because there aren't any.

Any more questions?

and here's your answers



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PostWed Nov 02, 2011 3:37 am » by The57ironman


shouldn't apartments be called nextoments...?

or proctologists be called astronauts...?
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