Funny Friday Joke:)

Fri Aug 20, 2010 11:34 pm » by **shifter**

> > Two Women were chatting in the office.
> >
> > Woman 1: I had sex last night, did you?
> >
> > Woman 2: Yes.
> >
> > Woman 1: Was it good?
> >
> > Woman 2: No, it was a disaster... My husband came home, ate his dinner
> > in three minutes, got on top of me, finished having sex in five minutes,
> > rolled over and fell asleep in two minutes. How was yours?
> > Woman 1: Oh it was amazing! My husband came home and took me out to a
> > romantic dinner. After dinner we walked for an hour. When we came home he
> > lit the candles around the house and we had an hour of foreplay. We then had
> > an hour long session of fantastic sex and afterwards talked for an hour. It
> > was like a fairytale!
> > At the same time, their husbands were talking at work.
> >
> > Husband 1: You wanted sex last night, how was it?
> >
> > Husband 2: Great. I came home, dinner was on the table, I ate, screwed
> > my wife and fell asleep. It was great! What about you?
> >
> > Husband 1: It was horrible. I came home, there's no dinner because
> > they cut the electricity because I hadn't paid the bill; so I had to take my
> > wife out to dinner which was so expensive that I didn't have money left for
> > a cab. We had to walk home which took an hour - and when we got home
> > remember there was no electricity so I had to light fucking candles all over
> > the house! I was so angry that I couldn't get it up for an hour and then I
> > couldn't come for another hour. After I finally did, I was so aggravated
> > that I couldn't fall asleep and my wife was jabbering away for another hour.
> > :ohno:

Fri Aug 20, 2010 11:45 pm » by **Tertiusgaudens**

How many guys fall asleep after having had sex?

10 %. The rest is getting up and going home...

Fri Aug 20, 2010 11:48 pm » by **Jax40**

Brilliant joke..lol

Fri Aug 20, 2010 11:51 pm » by **Tertiusgaudens**

What do two mathematicians in a swinger club?
They look for two unknown...

Fri Aug 20, 2010 11:56 pm » by **Tertiusgaudens**

A friend gave me a Viagra pill.
Sad to say I lost it into the john.
Now the toilet lid is always open...

Fri Aug 20, 2010 11:57 pm » by **F2f2f2**

dlslith cornbread

Sat Aug 21, 2010 12:04 am » by **sockpuppet**

The Philosophy Professor and the Student.

Two hours late for final exams, a student casually comes into the exam room. He looks around for a seat, and proceeds to walk up to the desk where his philosophy professor is sitting so he can get his exam. The professor tells him he may as well go home, since there is no way the student will be able to complete enough of the exam on time to pass the class. The student smiles at the professor, picks up the exam, and finds a seat in the lecture hall.

At the end of the exam period, the professor stops the clock and collects all the exams; except for one. The late student refuses to hand over his incomplete exam.

The professor decides to hang around to see what this young man has to say for himself. When the student finally finishes the exam, he walks up to the desk and asks "Do you know who I am?"
"I don't care who you are."
"Really, sir, do you know who I am?"
"I will not collect your exam; tear it up and put it in the garbage. You've already failed."
"Sir, do you KNOW who I am?"
"I don't care if your father is the dean of this college; throw away your exam!"
"Do you really not know who I am?"
"I DON'T CARE!"
"Good!"

...and the student picks up the stack of exams, shoves his in the middle, and leaves.

Sat Aug 21, 2010 12:07 am » by **Lowsix**

nice one sock.. ;p

Sat Aug 21, 2010 12:16 am » by **Tertiusgaudens**

Got it, sock, that remindes me the story of an final exam, and the topic was "Courage".
A student did nothing but smile, folded his empty sheet and wrote only one sentence on it: "THIS is courage!". Then he gave it to the examiner and left.

It is said that he not failed that exam...