Jedi faces discrimination @ Tesco

Sun Sep 20, 2009 10:02 pm » by **dlslith**

sawltydawg wrote:my religion dictates that i be mean to all, stab myself in the foot with a metal hotdog roasting stick on a daily basis...oh ya and i am supposed to eat one retard everyday... westcoast diet

i investigated the possibility of getting baptized in the church of JEDI.....but unfortunately my previous religious affiliation with the Klingons made that an impossibility..

According to legend, Kortar, the "first" Klingon, and his mate were created in a place called QI'tu'. The two destroyed the gods who made them and turned the heavens into ashes. This event is recounted in marriage ceremonies. In the episode "Barge of the Dead" on Star Trek: Voyager, B'Elanna Torres envisioned the Barge of the Dead in penance for the dishonour her Klingon mother, Miral, felt for not raising her half-human daughter to be a Klingon Warrior of the Way of Kahless. As she attempted (successfully) to escape going to Gre'Thor, realm of the dishonoured dead, B'Elanna met Kortar, whose fate when he died was to ferry Klingon souls over the River of Blood, to Gre'Thor's gates, where the demonic being Fek'lhr waited to consume particularly loathsome souls.

Afterlife
Klingons who follow the Way of the Warrior, the belief system developed by Kahless the Unforgettable, value honour above all else. Those who die with purpose and honour are said to join Kahless, who had been the first Klingon emperor, and a messianic figure in the Way of the Warrior, in the Black Fleet in Sto-Vo-Kor, a paradise where battle and feasting can eternally be shared and won. His name is evocative of the Estonian mythological hero Kalev.
The honoured dead are not mourned, but celebrated. This consists of opening the eyes of a dead warrior and all fellow Klingons present roar to chase away evil spirits called jat'lyn, and to tell the warriors in Sto-Vo-Kor that the warrior is joining them. The body of the dead warrior is viewed mainly as an empty shell to be disposed of; particularly well-respected warriors have their companions accompany the body for interment or disposal, "just" to keep away predators (though a privately held act of respect for the departed). Warriors who may have a question about whether they will be worthy to enter Sto-Vo-Kor, such as not having died in glorious battle, may have a dangerous quest held in their name by their surviving mate and his or her companions. Worf went on one such quest out of concern that Jadzia Dax would not enter Sto-Vo-Kor because she had been killed by a possessed Gul Dukat. If they win their stated deed or battle, they win honour for their late warrior and entry to paradise.

Beliefs
Klingon beliefs were recorded in a series of scrolls collectively referred to as the Paq'batlh, or Book of Honour. One prophecy, possibly taken from this book, was of the Kuvah'magh, a religious figure predicted to appear at some future time. Miral Paris, daughter of Tom Paris and B'Elanna Torres, was thought by some expatriate Klingons in the Delta Quadrant to be this new spiritual leader.
Gre'Thor (in Klingon, ghe'tor or 'ghe''or) is the Klingon afterlife where the dishonoured go when they die. It is the Klingon equivalent of hell and is guarded by a fearsome demon, Fek'lhr (roughly pronounced "Fek-Lar"; in Klingon, veqlargh). Those unfortunate Klingons who find themselves in Gre'Thor are faced with eternal torture by Fek'lhr and his demons; however, Klingon legend allows for souls to be saved from Gre'Thor, usually by heroic sacrifices performed by friends and family (Kahless, for example, once willingly journeyed to Gre'Thor to save his brother, Morath, and send him to Sto-Vo-Kor).
If a Klingon dies and is fated to journey to Gre'Thor, they will find themselves on the Barge of the Dead, which travels the 'river of blood' on its way to Gre'Thor. Klingon souls on the Barge are tempted by siren-like voices, masquerading as friends and family, who try to lure them off the edge and into the river. (As the Barge's pilot, Kortar, wryly points out, "There are things here much worse than death...")
Under normal circumstances it is difficult for the souls of dead Klingons to leave Gre'Thor, such as in the expression "I will surrender when spirits escape from Gre'Thor!" but the legend of Kahless does allow for such things. Another example is the mother of B'Elanna Torres, who was initially sent to Gre'Thor due to her daughter's misdeeds but was eventually released.
Gre'Thor also gives its name to the armouries in Star Trek: Armada II. Also the demon Fek'Lhr lends its name to the Klingon starship class.

Creation myth
In Klingon religion, the original gods who created the first Klingons were slain by their own creations, because they were "more trouble than they were worth" ("Homefront"). A version of this creation myth is told during the traditional Klingon wedding ceremony: ("You Are Cordially Invited...")
"With fire and steel did the gods forge the Klingon heart. So fiercely did it beat, so loud was the sound, that the gods cried out, 'On this day we have brought forth the strongest heart in all the heavens. None can stand before it without trembling at its strength.' But then the Klingon heart weakened, its steady rhythm faltered and the gods said, 'Why do you weaken so? We have made you the strongest in all of creation.'
And the heart said... 'I am alone.'
And the gods knew that they had erred. So they went back to their forge and brought forth another heart.
But the second heart beat stronger than the first, and the first was jealous of its power. Fortunately, the second heart was tempered by wisdom.
'If we join together, no force can stop us.'
And when the two hearts began to beat together, they filled the heavens with a terrible sound. For the first time, the gods knew fear. They tried to flee, but it was too late. The Klingon hearts destroyed the gods who created them and turned the heavens to ashes. To this very day, no one can oppose the beating of two Klingon hearts."
The only remaining otherworldly creature was Fek'lhr (veqlargh), the guardian of [re'thor (ghe'tor). The first Klingon, Kortar, was condemned to ferry dishonoured warriors to Gre'thor on the Barge of the Dead for the offence of killing the gods. ("Barge of the Dead")

Good shit dawg. Ka'pla. That's Canadian for Ka'pla

Sun Sep 20, 2009 10:06 pm » by **sawltydawg**

in quebec it would be La Ka'plaeau

Sun Sep 20, 2009 10:53 pm » by **Thesaint**

Look, I'm going to add this as 1. its funny and 2. I don't really want to start a new thread title just for this and I kinda feel that you will all think it's worth it. If I'm wrong and its not worth changing the direction of this thread, shoot me.

Today I was looking through the daily mail and I came across this. It's a write in about Derren Brown and whether he's a con man or not and Jo from london who thinks that everyone is a peasant wrote,

98.9% of the population are dumb chavs so suggestability is a breeze...
- Jo, London, UK,

and the killer answer came back

I bet some of those "dumb chavs" can spell suggestibility, though.
- Michael, Cardigan, UK,

So I thought I should share as IMO it's class.

Now back to the thread

Sun Sep 20, 2009 11:03 pm » by **jetxvii**

maybe you should read the racist thread six.

Mon Sep 21, 2009 1:15 am » by **Lowsix**

oh i did, i think its funny that you spent all that time trying to 'pop' me when you did nothing of the sort.

You actually made my point for me, and for that I thank you..
Its always better when someone backs you up when they think theyre nailing you..makes it more honest somehow..

Mon Sep 21, 2009 10:35 am » by **jetxvii**

LowSix wrote:oh i did, i think its funny that you spent all that time trying to 'pop' me when you did nothing of the sort.

You actually made my point for me, and for that I thank you..
Its always better when someone backs you up when they think theyre nailing you..makes it more honest somehow..

A simple cop out six. you contradict yourself that's a fact so your circular logic is taking over. don't worry its ok six. it just that someone else is shooting through the bullshit that you post not you-them. I like some of the stuff you post but I see that on some of it your thoughts are arrogant and misguided as I proved by posting your rhetorical theories on religion and life.

you have nothing to type because you got busted by it. try to defend against what you said six. and stick on topic I would like to hear this. you clearly stated by those messages that religion (Claiming you're a christian) shouldn't be made fun of because its a representation of people around you with the "end zone dance". then you go and bash someone else for their religious views among other things.. everyone go see for yourself on this topic:

topic9075.html

it's page 12 at the bottom a post by me.
Low six is a liar and a hypocrite at times. stay on one path six it will do you good. oh and remember low six its only words ok?

Sat Dec 12, 2009 12:08 am » by **Marduk2012**

Force of Jedi church proves too much for brother

One of the brothers no longer wants to be recognised

One of two brothers who set up a Jedi church on Anglesey is stepping out of the limelight. Brandon Jones, 28, says he still holds his beliefs in "living positively" but no longer wanted wider publicity. He would only appear off camera for a BBC short documentary about living as a Jedi with his brother Daniel, 22.

The Holyhead-based church is continuing but Daniel Jones says his brother was affected by extreme reactions to their beliefs, including an assault. In April 2008, a man appeared in court after assaulting Mr Jones and his cousin whilst dressed as Darth Vader. The two had been filming themselves playing with light sabres in a garden at the time. A shopping trip bought further adverse publicity after Daniel was allegedly asked to leave a supermarket for refusing to remove his hood.

The brothers, and their parents, have recently been featured for the short documentary, Living with the Jedi, produced for BBC Scotland. The film notes that in the 2001 British census 390,127 adults claimed their faith was Jedi. In the film parents, Sonia and Kim, are seen speaking about Daniel and his interest in George Lucas' classic Star Wars film series.

Daniel is then interviewed about the church, and the idea that people should "work on the light side of life" and "do good".

Not everyone takes his belief seriously, and in the documentary a passer-by can be heard shouting "Darth Vader" as he is interviewed in the garden of his home.

On film Daniel speaks of the "abuse" suffered as a result.

"I think he (his brother) took it in a really bad way", he said.

Thu Dec 31, 2009 11:00 pm » by **Buhdoo**

marduk2012 wrote:

"I think he (his brother) took it in a really bad way", he said.

LOL!!!

What did he expect?!?

That people would suddenly accept jedis as a religious group because its in a film?

He could have lived on the 'light side' of life without pretending he's a frigging jedi.. i mean c'mon.. playing in the garden with lightsabers? some people ask for the abuse they get im afraid.. and im usually a nice guy..

I'm waiting for the world of warcraft religion next..